Messy

Too much heartbeats, too much worries. too much Beethoven's Silencio. I thought, it was better off this way. With his silencio, and my coffee, and my quiet complains. They were all in the head. The worries, the sorrows, So grey, pale. I didn't know that they were bad, until now. It's the caffeine. Stupid chemical. fucked up your life.

Or maybe it's not it at all. It's still happening, you know. the wholre teenage identity crisis. I'm like spain. Spain, the country which still survives in the edge, waiting for helps. maybe I am Spain. I survive, I am surviving obviously. Who's gonna help anyways? Or maybe I am not even Spain. Maybe I am Greece, who's dead already but wanting to live...

Or maybe I am okay but I don't know, and the heart beats even faster as I start to wonder what it is. Maybe, I am okay, or I am confused in the borderline. Maybe I am just, confused. as always. 

~