Thursday, May 31, 2012

lack of sleep, lack of spare times, lack of inspirations.



Try to Open these closed minds
To reveal their side of the kinds
So hard you see nothing to find
Eyes have been long in a blind

Friend

Friend, you said. in german, it's freund, in spanish it's amigo, in bahasa it's teman, in french it's ami, in your language it's vriend. oh it looks so similar to english but your people love to replace an f with "v". in here you'd be called ghetto. oh big amen for that. I am so mad at you. if it's all about the whole imperalistic colonialism stratification that you're the dutch, and I am the native Indonesian, makes you the boss I am the slave. I demand human rights here. who do you see me as? vriend? ik weet niet. you tell me. there are many things I would love to tell you, many things. God knows. And when I just get excited, you just start to run the imperialistic colonialism stratification system to me. we used to be vriends.
This is Carla, Carla Bruni, an italian woman who left school when she was 19, and became a model for Guess to Chanel, and then she began to write songs and became a singer, and now she is Nicholas Sarkozy's wife, the former president of france. She looks very calm, and nice. I have never seen her so booming the world, but I'm pretty sure people would make a documentary film about her biography when she dies.. and that time, people will try to recall her and how great she was. So far, this is the kind of girl I want to be, after Theodora, the wife of Lord Justinian, King of Constantinople.

Friday, May 25, 2012

 And you showed me your "cat" though it looked like a dog. And I felt you smiling though I couldn't even see your mouth. And your hand waved at me... It's beautiful. It was beautiful, enjoying me, having you, and you having me. and somehow we're just ours. We just are. Through all the blissful moments and the bitter fights, it's been such a great time-wasting. Remember how I wasted my study time to just look at my cell phone screen, typing with you, or how you wasted your sleeping time, typing with me... How priceless we would feel about us when we have been the happiest... I don't know about you, but I have felt that and I will always feel something for you.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

might go to Introdans show this saturday. so excited. can't wait ^^ Introdans is this ballet show that will be perfomed by this dutch team. I'll watch it in the dutch cultural center, erasmus huis, by myself. yay

extra diets. I gained 5 kilos these in these 2 months. It's getting crazy, I won't eat. I won't. sorry tummy.
I had my first LSD effect today. erm, hallucination. although I haven't been doing any drugs. I thought I saw a frog near this curb I was walking on, and I kind of jumped and kind of screamed, "what the fuck" spontaneously. Those people who were there glanced at me, as I shouted in english. And when I looked at it again, nothing was there. nice.
Volcano



























It's been a big while... Learning life. if there are two people, one happy, one is not happy. they are probably destined to not be happy together so if the unhappy becomes happy somehow, the happy one will be unhappy. it's cycle. and to just hurt someone, karma will bitch at you back. so what I do is nothing.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012


Found Big Jet Plane Acoustic Version. It's dope.
 ~
duh math test. after getting caught on cheating during biology examination, my urge to study has been decreasing lately. I had Math examination today, geometry test.. I don't feel like I just did a test. because my paper was kind of plain. ha-ha.
People
I get brainwashed at least three times a day. It starts with my logical father, my half-superstitious mother, and my truly superstitious grandmother at home. And when I go to school, I meet my politic-addict, religion-freak, and irrationally self-optimistic teachers. I also meet my superstitious friends with their "ghost" stories. And I also meet those friends who are verry, political and loving controversials. I also meet my controversial-lover vocal coach there. And when I take a little bit of rest from them all, I meet my theoritical, liberal best friends. Well behind all of this, why don't you people just calm yourself down? Stop defending your shits. Because all these disorganized brainwashing moments, I can see who's neutral and keep connecting to the absolute normality, and who's ignoring the irrational insanity. We are people. Now did you say you didn't need a massive stratification for this? Think again. They're getting mad; unbelievably mad.. you don't know.

You.

 ________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Oh I wish you could find out about me who's changed already. I wish you could compare me in the past and me in this present time. I wish your friends would tell you how distinctive I have become. I wish you knew that I am no longer naive and silly.

Sunday, May 6, 2012

so fuck everyone who went to coachella. since I failed on my afs test, I wouldn't have any possibilty of going overseas and live there and attend public events there. it's pretty sad. I have been planning to get out of here since forever, but nothing happened. maybe it's because of the efforts i have made. maybe they were never been good enough. it's so sad. damn. I can't even make a meaningful paragraph right now. it's just plain. vacant. hollow. empty. aw. yeah. happy monday tomorrow, peole! and happy monday to me. hopefully. i mean hopefully, this monday will be full of joy and i'll be happy. does that make sense?


The Honey Trees - To be with you


"Oh I'd wait for the seas to part, to be with you"
Verfasser Unbennkant
Page 95

Freundschaft gleicht dem Wein
In kurze ist er trankbereit
aber Duft und Wert und Wurze
gibt ihm erst de Zeit


 today I decided to shop with my mom. and enjoy the special air in this mall. enjoy the crowds, the price tags, everything. it's the last day of the weekend. nobody wants to be locked inside the house.

waaromniet.

 So I changed my blog's name again... "waaromniet" it means why not in dutch. and i thought why not aahaha. i think, we should keep thinking why not when we about to try something postivie. i mean why not. right? now it's not even making sense at all ahahaha so waarom niet? bienvenido.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Wishes are truly great
Like a lovely lullaby in my head
With efforts you have not made
Don't expect to see them coming ahead
~
It's the day where I started to google Marlboro. and Marlboro weeds showed up. and i thought, how weird weed could be in Marlboro. because I don't think Marlboro would spare its tobacco and be one hundred percents weed. And I began to google Heineken. and tehy guided me to fidy cents. very funny. And I found out about "arena" in los angeles. or "mistere" in jakarta. it's fun, knowing things, knowing bad things. it's like, consuming ecstasy during ramadan. always fresh and excited even though i know im not supposed to be excited. And as I fall deeper, and deeper in my own fanatasy about the "freedom" I have defined before. I realized that, I only want to campfire, grilling marshamallow alone. or maybe with you.

^^


I didn't get accepted to AFS cultural program thingy. Maybe it's not my thing at all... memorizing shits like presidents of other countries. I actually don't really give a thing to germany. I mean NAZI fucking grew there. NAZI, people. genocides. boohoo hitler stuff. it's pretty sad huh. yay I didn't get accepted. yay I'm gonna be stuck in this... place for the rest of my life. yay pollution. yay ugly education system. yay american wannabes. yay chauvinism. yay yay yay. isn't this perfect? I'm gonna fail many things in the future and I won't ever get a scholaship and get out of this "place". yay indonesian for eternity! 17 agustus 1945! yay.
F A N T A S Y

Forgotten Cartoons.

Creamy Mami, The Magic Angel.
Performed in Lativi, the previous name of TvOne, Indonesian channel.
Creamy Mami sounds.. inappropriate haha. Creamy Mami tells a story about a girl that turns into "Creamy Mami" and becomes a famous singer. it's like Hannah Montana, old anime version. why didn't they just name "Creamy Hannah?" or "Mami hannah?" ahahaa


Minki Momo
Performed in Lativi too.
It's a story about a girl that can turn into anything she wants... in adult version of her... but with various occupations. ahhhh gentrophile status.

and stuff. 
Males ngeblog :'( 

GRADATION STEVE, LOOK AT MY BLOG NOW. DAMN IT!